The Moon is Down
by totallypants
Summary: Neither of them notice it. But there can be no doubt that it's there, burning between them. It's as natural as the cycle of the moon.
1. Chapter 1

The church clock chimed somewhere in the distance, but he didn't hear it. He was throwing his belongings haphazardly into a large, leather-bound trunk which sat at the bottom of his four poster bed. There was no logic or sequence to his actions. He had to be fast. He had to get out. He could hear his mother screaming at Regulus. Or maybe at the house elf. He cast a shrinking charm on the trunk and its contents and stowed his birch wand safely in the pocket of his black jeans before securing the trunk to his broomstick. He wrenched open the old fashioned curtains which stood between him and the harsh night awaiting him. The window opened with a lurch, almost egging him on. He mounted his broom and kicked off silently into the clear summer evening. It was colder than he had expected and he was not dressed entirely appropriately. He did not even know where he was going. His black hair billowed in the wind as he turned and twisted, making his mark on the ebony sky.

He had been flying for about an hour when he saw London flash into view. His stomach rumbled aggressively and he realised that he had not eaten a thing since daybreak. He had little money, however and did not know London well. He wasn't sure how a flying teenager asking for nourishment would be taken so he decided not to risk it. He continued to fly, passing towns and villages, too high to make out people or their houses. Too high to be caught.

Hunger continued its ruthless assault on his body, but he was too exhilarated to care. The altitude chilled him to the bone, but he kept flying. The wind beat against his cheeks causing them to redden. His hands were numb, stretched out in front of him, clinging to his broom. He should have worn gloves. He could have stopped to ransack his trunk and find warmer clothing, but he could not know his whereabouts. Safety was not guaranteed. He kept flying.

The shrill words of his mother rang through his head like a drill. He should probably have been sad, he thought to himself. He wondered why he wasn't. He knew he was never going back. He knew his future had changed unalterably that day and he was flying toward his fate. He still had no idea where he would end up, but he knew he was flying with a purpose.

At that moment, an owl catapulted headlong into his face, causing him to lose control of his broomstick which proceeded to tailspin, falling faster and faster towards the ground below. He panicked yet managed to regain some control. The ground grew and grew as he plummeted lower and lower. He landed with a bump, shocked but unscathed. He stood quickly and surveyed the landscape. It was a field. He sighed, relieved. There was a slight whining noise being emitted from a bush adjacent to him and he walked over to investigate. He found a bundle of feathers and realised it was the owl whose erratic flying style had been the cause of this accident. He lifted it reassuringly from the brambles and saw that it was injured. He noticed a roll of parchment tied to its leg which he proceeded to unravel, looking around shiftily as if he should not have been reading it. It read:

_Dear Sirius, _

_We heard about what happened and Mum made sure I sent Eddie immediately to try to find you and bring you here. We just want to make sure you are safe. Remus is here too (he had a bit of a tiff with that girl he says he has at home). Please come. _

_James_

Sirius chuckled heartily. Of course! He was always welcome at James'. He knew he hadn't been flying for nothing. By the looks of things, he was nearly there. He gathered his things quickly, wrapped the little owl in his cloak, mounted his broom and put the delicate little bundle into his lap before setting off into the biting cold once more.

Minutes later, Sirius was knocking cautiously at the big oak door of the place he saw as his home. He knew it was late and hoped he wasn't waking anybody. His fears vanished, however as he heard an excited cry of "he's here!" and James bounded to greet him, swinging the door open and embracing his friend warmly. Following him equally enthusiastically though with slightly less bounce was his other best friend. Remus Lupin. Sirius noticed that he had grown over the summer and looked as tired as ever. Remus pulled him into an effortless hug and Sirius felt good for the first time in weeks. He knew he would be okay as long as he was here. As long as he was with them, he was home.

He handed James the bundle and smiled, "Somebody needs to work on his navigational skills. It's nothing a bit of a healing charm won't fix." The owl chirruped as soon as he saw James who cooed and cradled him like a baby.

"Oh my poor little Eddie, did you have a bit of an accident, mate?" The bird cocked its head with the same vacant expression on his face.

"I'll make some tea" Remus smiled and disappeared into the kitchen.

"I'll help" Sirius grinned and practically skipped after his friend.

Remus stood with his back to the door, reaching for the teabags in one of the cupboards in the Potters' large but warm kitchen. Sirius sneaked up behind him and snaked his arms around Remus' middle, squeezing him affectionately. Remus looked around and smiled; dimples appearing in his cheeks.

"Hey Pads. Missed you." He muttered sleepily.

"Missed you too Remmie" Sirius released his grip and started to fidget on the spot like a puppy, agitated and bored. "So has James ensnared the lovely Lily yet?" He started standing on one leg.

"Of course he hasn't. He sent her a toad, for Merlin's sake! 'Dear Lily. Kiss this and I might just materialise. Your Prince. James xxx'. It was a poor effort, if I may say so."

"And how about you, Moonie? Is there love on the horizon?" Sirius' eyes darted to the amber eyes of his best friend. He looked down in what he hoped was a nonchalant manner.

"Me? Well my relationships tend to last a couple of months. Girls always think I'm "hiding something"" he grinned sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck "I don't know, Pads. I just don't think I'm the loving kind, or more accurately, girls can't love me. The wolf in me is unpredictable and inconsistent. I just can't be a reliable boyfriend."

"But that's what makes you ace! Keep 'em on their toes and all that jazz. Who wants a boring James-type boyfriend, when they can have a Moony?" Sirius crossed the kitchen in response to the squealing kettle which hung over the fire. He found a grotty looking cloth which he wrapped around the iron handle to stop himself from getting burned and carried the kettle to the work surface where Remus was now sitting, swinging his legs like a small boy.

"And what about you, eh? Rugged good looks, bloody clever, the only boy in school who could actually grow a beard" he paused and glanced through Sirius' veil of ebony hair to the icy grey eyes lurking underneath "What happened with you and Keira Peters? Why did you break up with her?"

Sirius looked determinedly at the terracotta floor tiles. "How do you know it wasn't the

other way around?"

"Because you've never been dumped in your life. Every girl in school wants to marry you. They all think they can be the one to change you; to tame the wild beast. I'm pretty sure none of them would end a relationship with you" Remus pulled some mugs from the cupboard above him and clinked them down before pouring the tea into them one by one. Sirius said nothing. Remus said nothing. Remus handed Sirius one of the steaming mugs. Still nobody spoke. Sirius lifted himself up to sit on the same counter and flopped his head onto Remus' waiting shoulder.

Sirius took a deep breath. "I guess I didn't feel anything" he mumbled "I never really do."

"Well you just haven't found the right girl" Remus smiled encouragingly, taking a sip of his tea.

"Hmm" Sirius looked at his broken shoelace "you're probably right, Remmie. Maybe I'm just, in the immortal words of Witches Aloud, not the loving kind."

Remus rested his head on Sirius', sinking into his soft, floppy hair. "Siri" he sighed "You are pretty much the most loving person anyone could hope to meet. I know you've had it tough this week. But you must know that what you had with your family, that wasn't love. People like that don't know the meaning of love. Love is like a fire in your heart. A reason for living" he lifted his head and surveyed his friend's expression. "I think, Pads, you can find that here with me... a-and James..." he added, his cheeks reddening though he wasn't sure why.

Sirius' eyes glistened with unshed tears and Remus could see his attempt to blink them away. One rebellious streak of salty water, however, ventured down his cheek. Remus brushed his knuckle lightly across his friend's skin. Sirius clasped his hand lightly and gently squeezed it. Their gazes were locked for what seemed like eternity.

"Where's this bloody tea then, eh?" James strolled in, head held high and did not notice the two boys shifting quickly into a somewhat less friendly position. Remus handed James a pink, floral mug and smiled unconvincingly. He wasn't sure why he was feeling this way, but he was resentful of the fact that James had come in. He was so close to Sirius. Like brothers, he told himself. He wasn't sure whether he believed that or not, but he was a rational boy so rationalising his closeness with Sirius was the only way he could let himself maintain it.


	2. Chapter 2

_Hello! I wrote this story a while back, and really really like it, so I hope you will agree! Please review, it really does make my day. I've also picked up where I left off with 'Fallback'. I'm sorry for the (really big) delay, but I'm having lots of fun writing it and hopefully it will be up soon. Enjoy!_

The days passed. The summer rain pounded on the rooftop of the Potters' cottage. It was incredibly humid and the sky was filled with dark, moody clouds which seemed to fill almost as soon as they had emptied. Lightning scarred the black sky for days on end. The boys were cooped up in James' room, staring at the rain through the open window. Watching it fall in great splats on the courtyard below, forming pools big enough to cover the entire garden. A clap of thunder roared through the house, shaking the eaves, making everybody jump.

"I say we go out and play quidditch anyway" James whined, pushing his nose against the window pane, his breath fogging up the glass. He drew a heart in the condensation and wrote 'James loves Lily' underneath "I'm boreeeeeeeed!"

"Dude, we can't play now! Look at it!" Sirius chuckled deeply.

"Actually, I'm with James on this one" Remus' smooth voice chipped in "So we get wet. Is that really the end of the world? It's better than sitting here all day. I would, however like to remind you that I am abysmal at this sport and I would prefer to not be mocked ruthlessly from the moment I get on that broomstick."

"No deal!" James and Sirius chimed together as they ran outside; immediately drenched.

The boys played all afternoon; taking turns to shoot at the goal due to the lack of players. The time passed quickly , yet when James was called inside to help his mother prepare the dinner, Remus was relieved that he could finally touch his feet to the ground. He would always rather read a book than ride a broom, yet he would do almost anything to make his friends happy. This was one of those things.

"Hey Remmie, you're improving!" Sirius grinned his slightly crooked grin and took the three broomsticks to the coal shed at the bottom of the long, twisting garden. Remus followed him, splashing through boggy puddles, sinking into the mud, his canvas trainers were now covered in brown slush, but he didn't mind. It was nice to be outside. Here. With Sirius. And James. And Sirius.

Sirius unlocked the rusty padlock and pulled the creaking door open, throwing the brooms inside, disturbing a thick layer of dust, highlighted by the streams of light pouring in through the cracks in the boarded up window. He turned and grinned broadly at the sight of the tall, sandy-haired boy before him. In the rain, Remus' long eyelashes stuck together and darkened, framing his big, pale eyes. The shirt he was wearing was soaked through and clung to his skin. Sirius felt his stomach stir as he saw a drop of rain fall from Remus' hair onto his cheek. It ran down his face and settled on his soft lips. Remus' tongue darted out softly to lick it off and taste the rain. Sirius realised he was staring and was relieved when Remus turned to walk back up the garden.

The two went inside to change and get dry. They entered James's room; small, low-ceilinged, painted red with one wall dominated by a large dragon poster and the kit of the Chudley Cannons framed and hanging slightly wonky. They had to be careful not to sit anywhere while wearing their wet and muddy clothes, so they quickly changed, standing in the middle of the room, dripping onto the carpet. Sirius' cheeks flushed, he mumbled an excuse and disappeared downstairs. Remus stood, perplexed, fastening his belt and reaching for a muggle rugby shirt, pulling it over his head. He collapsed onto the bed with a thud and stared at the oak beams lining the ceiling. He didn't feel in control of his emotions, of his feelings.

He lay there with his heart racing, rattling his ribcage. He didn't know what was going on, but he knew it wasn't good. He closed his eyes, yet he saw only a crooked grin and icy eyes, floppy black hair and raised eyebrows. He tried to blink the image away, but Sirius's face was engraved in his mind. He was in trouble. He was falling for his best friend, the most popular boy in school. This was absurd! Sirius was a boy. Boys weren't supposed to like other boys. Remus was not supposed to like Sirius. He shook his head. It wasn't like he didn't still find girls attractive. He certainly didn't find any other boys attractive. He may have been booksmart but he didn't understand the deeper sort of magic coursing through his veins. The spell that Sirius cast upon him was stronger than the darkest magic. He had to fix this. He _would_ fix this. There was no way he was going to jeopardise his most important friendship over a silly crush. He turned over, pushed his face into the pillow and emitted a muffled groan. He would fix this.


	3. Chapter 3

_Please review! xxx Anna_

Three days later, Mrs Potter took the boys to Diagon Alley to buy their books and robes for the new school term which would begin the next day. Each remarked upon how quickly the summer months had passed as they tried on their robes and paid with a number of sickles. Around half an hour later, the three sat in the tavern at the bottom of the street. Remus bought them all butter beers which the other two boys accepted gratefully. James' mum was shopping for groceries and planned to meet the boys in an hour. They would all stay in the Leaky Cauldron that night, ready to catch the Hogwarts Express the next morning. The boys were buzzing with nervous energy, excited to return to school for their sixth year. Remus was anxious to be back in the company of girls. That should sort him out, he thought. This would end his little crush once and for all.

"Okay, okay" Sirius laughed throatily, causing Remus' stomach to contract "Would you rather sweat mayonnaise or poo cheese?"

"Cheese. For sure" James nodded sincerely "At least then, you could keep it behind closed doors"

"Yeah but at least the mayonnaise thing would keep you apart form the crowd. You'd go down in history as the boy who had mayonnaise coming out of his armpits." Sirius chuckled.

"Trust me being different is not always a good thing" Remus smiled, taking a sip of his drink, feeling the warmth spread through his body.

A busty blonde barmaid walked to their table, leant over provocatively and picked up an empty glass, winking at Sirius as she walked away. He smiled coyly at his friends.

"Ah Cassandra, taught me everything I know."

"No way, man, you actually did the dirty with Mrs Chesty over there?" James gawped.

"Yeah a couple of times when I was here last autumn" he raised his eyebrows.

"So you're saying that possibly the hottest woman in the magical world had sex with an arrogant, self assured minor who had no clue what to do with his tiny little penis?" James stared at Sirius in disbelief.

"Twice" Sirius winked.

"How the hell do you do it?" James laughed "you're not _that _good looking!"

" Hey, I'm with you, mate. But women seem to disagree. I don't have the _option _of being a virgin like some people" Sirius glanced at James.

"Well Lily is my one and only. I'm saving myself for her."

"Touching. Really." said Sirius, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "There's no harm in getting a bit of practise in before the big event. Dude, you might _die _a virgin if you wait for Evans all your life. Especially at the rate you're going."

"Yeah? Well what about Moony? He's hardly shacking it up with a different girl every night is he?" James said indignantly.

"I wouldn't be so sure" Sirius smirked "I've heard some tales on the grapevine. Word is that Moony's a bit of a beast in the bedroom!"

Remus blushed visibly. James gazed at him in shock.

"Remus, I thought you were a virgin?" James asked.

"Erm... not as such" the werewolf laughed nervously.

"I knew it!" Sirius' smirk grew "So how many times have you done it?"

"I wouldn't be able to say. I could tell you how many girls..." Remus was trying to avoid looking either of them in the eye.

"Ah, you see, with Sirius, these two figures are pretty much the same" James sneered.

"Harsh!" Sirius wailed in mock-disgust "So how many girls, Remmie?"

"Right, Emmy Pollard was number one; in a haystack, very romantic. Steph Delbeckio was my first proper girlfriend, we were together a couple of months. Carly Ross, Charlotte Blinker, Hermes Tallon, Molly Tappard, Helen Kelsey, Terrie Shryder. Aannd Fiona Parsons, a couple of months ago..." he trailed off.

"Wait! The girl from the Stew Pony? The one who waited our table? The _really _hot one!?" James gawped.

"It was nearly the full moon and she was throwing herself at me. I have very little control when the wolf takes over... we did it in the toilets" Remus was now scarlet, but Sirius looked thrilled that he had competition for the lothario crown.

"Remus, you sly dog!"

"But how the hell do you get all these girls?" James was slowly recovering from the shock.

"Hey, come on! It's Moony! He's got that whole sensitive, understanding thing going on that chicks dig. But then it's plain to see that the beast in him takes over when it comes down to sex" Sirius laughed "Plus he's better looking than everyone at Hogwarts (except me of course) and ten times as smart."

"Sirius, you sound like you're queuing up to join the 'I heart Remus' fan club" James mocked, but did not notice his black haired friend shifting uncomfortably in his seat. At that point, James' mum walked into the bar, spotted the boys and waved friendlily, walking over, carrying bags of food she had picked up from Try-n-Hex, the Wizard supermarket.

"Hello boys" she smiled, putting the bags down on the stained paisley carpet. "Now, slight change of plans, I'm afraid. James, your father has come down with a bug. Nothing serious, but I'm going to have to go home to make sure he's okay. The Leaky Cauldron won't let you stay there alone tonight because you're all under-age, but they have some spare rooms here and the rules are a bit more relaxed. However..." she raised her voice slightly "I am trusting you boys to be on your best behaviour tonight and make your own way to the train tomorrow. If I hear of any trouble you have caused, don't think I won't come back down here and sort you out. Am I making myself perfectly clear?"

The boys nodded, secretly thrilled at the prospect of a night without adult supervision and exchanged subtle glances.

"Right, now I really do have to go, and I'm sorry about this. Now you boys have a good term and behave yourselves. Say hello to young Mr Pettigrew for me and don't give me any reason for concern, okay?" She hugged each of the boys in turn, picked up her bags and hurried out of the small inn.

"Hell yes!" James grinned from ear to ear. "This is going to be great! Let's go check out our rooms!"

"Okay, gimme a sec" Sirius glanced around and caught the eye of the barmaid and beckoned her over "Cassie, looking as good as ever" he smiled, sounding confident but somehow not slimy as some men sound when talking to women "The boys and I are staying here tonight. Would you do us a favour and show us to our rooms please?"

"Oh, of course, Sirius" she fluttered her eyelashes "Follow me boys!" She turned and walked up the stairs, wiggling her hips seductively, stopping in the hallway and handing each of the boys a key "Right, Sirius, you're number thirty two, you are number thirty three and you, handsome," looking Remus in the eye "You're thirty four."

"Thanks" Remus smiled, opened his door and surveyed his room, seeing a generous double bed and simple but ample furnishings. He closed the door behind him and sat on the bed, rummaging in his bag and pulling out 'Mrs Dalloway' by Virginia Woolf. (WRITE MORE)

A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door and it swung open. The sight of Sirius caused his heart to beat just a little bit quicker. Sirius came over, sat on the bed, resting his head on Remus' chest without saying a word. He reached for the remote control and turned on the television. The voice of Regulus Dromis, Minister for Magic filled the room. Sirius groaned and switched it off again.

"Your bed's more comfortable than mine" Sirius grinned, snuggling up to his friend and promptly falling asleep. Remus groaned and felt the weight of Sirius' head upon his chest, though the feeling was not completely unwelcome. In fact, it was lovely. But the encounter only confused Remus further. In a fit of panic, he pushed Sirius off him and watched helplessly as he tumbled to the floor.

"OI!" Sirius yelled "What the hell did you do that for?" He stood up, glaring at Remus who was still on the bed.

"Sorry, Pads, I fell asleep and did that weird thing, you know, when you feel like you're falling and then you kind of jerk awake? Yeah... I did that and you happened to get in the way" Remus lied very convincingly. Sirius shrugged and sat on the bed.

"Fool." Sirius laughed "Do you reckon I could convince the lovely Cassie to keep me company tonight?"

"I think you'd have to convince her _not _to keep you company" Remus laughed, trying not to look too put-out "She was all over you earlier."

"Hmm we'll see if anything better comes along first" Sirius looked down.

"Better than _her? _Does better actually exist?"

"It sure does, Moonpie! Or at least if better _does _exist, said person will be occupying my bed tonight!" Sirius laughed.

James strutted in with a big, beaming smile. "Shall we go down to dinner then?"

The boys ate, talked and drank until nightfall when Sirius started talking to Cassie at the bar. Remus and James continued talking, yet James couldn't help but notice that his companion seemed somewhat distracted by Sirius' antics. James got out of his chair and walked to the bar to buy more drinks. Remus sighed as he watched Sirius brush a stray strand of hair out of the blonde girl's face, gazing into her eyes like she was the only girl who mattered in the world. Just then, Sirus happened to turn slightly and saw Remus looking straight at him. Their eyes met for a second before Remus looked away, embarrassed. James returned and shoved a glass of something yellow under his nose-. A pungent smell met his nostrils.

"What the hell is this?" Remus asked, already slurring slightly.

"Well I don't know, do I?" James began laughing hysterically "But it is gooooood!"

"This looks disgusting" Remus began, but then glanced over at Sirius whose tongue seemed to have disappeared inside the woman's ear, "Oh what the hell!" He took a swig. "Wow, this is worse than I thought" he laughed.

"At least you can drown your Siri-sorrows" James raised his eyebrows and laughed at Remus' shocked face.

"I- I don't know what you're on about" Remus avoided James' piercing eyes.

"You can't fool me, Remmie boy" James grinned "You like Sirius!"

"You don't even know that, stop making assumptions, you're so lame" Remus flailed a hand limply in James' face.

"Okay, Rem, I think this is your last drink" James laughed "But there's no point lying, I know you like him."

Remus frowned "He's just so nice and funny and snuggly. And he's so brilliantly... hairy. I mean he has nice hair. I mean... Oh I don't know. James, I know he will never have any amorous inclinations towards me, just let me live in my drunken little bubble."

"Trust you to use big words when you're wasted. Tell you what, we'll talk about this tomorrow when you're a little more... yourself, okay?" James downed his drink and quickly appeared with two more, offering one to Remus which he gratefully accepted.

An hour later, Remus and James were helping each other up the spiralling staircase. James opened the door to his room, said goodnight to Remus and disappeared inside. Remus walked further along the corridor where he found Sirius and his buxom companion kissing passionately against his door. He tried to dodge the couple and unlock his door without them realising he was there but he lost his balance and fell ungracefully on his face, causing them to part and investigate the disturbance.

"Woah, Remmie, whatcha doing down there?" Sirius asked, his eyes full of concern. Remus mumbled something that seemed to contain the words "bedtime" and "yellow stuff."

"Oh Merlin, how much have you had, Rem?" Sirus bent down, his hair flopping in his eyes and helped Remus to his feet "Come on buddy, let's get you inside." He turned to the woman "Cassie, beautiful Cassie, I'm so sorry, I've got to take care of him." He kissed her softly on the lips, opened Remus' door and went to lead him to his bed before changing his mind and steering towards the bathroom. He sat his friend down before the toilet and lowered himself down onto the cold, ceramic floor, leaning his head on the hand basin.

"I've never seen you like this, Remus", Sirius held his friend's hair back as he plunged his head once more into the toilet "What a mess" he laughed "And we have to get up in four hours". Remus groaned which was amplified by the toilet bowl, amusing Sirius greatly. When Remus seemed to be done, Sirius knelt behind him and let Remus rest his head on his lap to save him from passing out with his head in the toilet. He stroked Remus' hair comfortingly while his friend whimpered.

"I don't want to be sick any more" Remus sobbed.

"Shh, I know Moony, but this will get it all out of your system and we won't have to go and see a healer." He carried on stroking his hair softly "You'll feel better soon, I promise" he whispered.

"Want to go to bed please" Remus mumbled.

"Sorry mate, I can't let you do that. If you never woke up, I might actually get laid, and we can't have that, can we?" Sirius chuckled.

"Siri, I'm sorry. You can go if you like. I'll be fine and she's really pretty"

"Mate, if you drowned in this toilet, I would never forgive myself. Besides, your hair is _really _soft. What shampoo do you use?" Sirius asked, but he never heard a reply as Remus began to heave once more.

About an hour later, Sirius judged it to be safe to let Remus go to bed, tucking him in so he wouldn't be cold and placing a bin on top of the bedside table just in case. Still, he thought he should probably stay to ensure that Remus would be okay. As he was only taking up a tiny amount of space in the big double bed, Sirius thought it would be fine to sleep on the other side. He climbed in, accidentally kicking Remus before turning off the reading light. As soon as his head hit the pillow, he was fast asleep and only woke the next morning when James came running in. Remus was dressing himself, trying to forget his behaviour the night before and glancing towards the boy who had apparently shared his bed.


End file.
